Friday, February 13, 2009

Update





Pictures were taken night before my surgery. February 1, 2009

I have not done Friday Funnies for a while.

Actually I have not been blogging for a while.

My surgery was almost pain free. At my last check-up I
Weighted 302#. It is difficult having to monitor my drinking
by drinking 2 ounces at a time, usually with 15 minutes in
between to let my stomach empty for the next filling.

I was in the right place to have had a heart reaction. I am now taking
Blood pressure medicine. I am also taking cumidin to thin my blood.

Thanks for your prayers on my behalf.
A man stood on the side of the road hitchhiking on a very dark night in the middle of a storm. The night was rolling and no cars passed. The storm was so strong; he could hadly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly he saw a car come towards him and stop. The guy, without thinking about it, got in the car and closed the door, only to realize that nobody was behind the wheel. The car started slowly. The guy looked at the road and saw a curve coming his way. Scared, he started praying, and begged for his life. He hadn't come out of shock, when just before he hit the curve, a hand appeared through the window and moved the wheel. The guy, paralyzed in terror, watched how the hand appeared every time before a curve.
The guy gathered strength, jumped out of the car and ran to the nearest town. Wet and in shock, he ran into a cantina, asked for two shots of tequila, and started telling everybody about the horrible experience he went through. A silence enveloped everybody when they realized the guy was crying and wan't drunk. About half and hour later, two guys walked into the same cantina, and one said to the other, "Look, there's the character who climbed into the car while we were pushing it!"
Airline laughs
Airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight "safety lecture" and their other announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported:
"Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride."
"As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the light attendants. Pleases do not leave children or spouses."
Heard on Southwest Airlines just after a very had landing in Salt Lake City: The flight attendant came on the intercome and said, That was quite a bump, and I know what y'all are thinking. I'm here to tellyou it wasn't the airline's fauld, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault...it was the asphalt."

4 comments:

  1. Hi Lois,
    I'm glad to hear that you are doing better. I can't wait to see how this helps you.
    Your jokes were really funny my friend.
    Big Hugs to you today!
    Kim

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  2. stopped by to see how you were doing. glad to hear it's all good!!

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  3. Lois, my friend recently had the surgery done, and she is doing really well. I hope you are, too.

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  4. Hope you are doing well. (I keep checking your blog almost everyday...need another update. I updated my blog tonight...

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